I read the line I used for the title of this blog today, I giggled…for a long time. It put a smile on my dopey face, so I hope it does yours too. (dopey face was only in reference to myself) Did I help make you smile?
Today I went on a walk after my nap. That nap was vital, I missed my last two hours of college, but without that nap I would feel like a poop bag. (I still cant believe there are bags..for poop). I realized over the past few weeks that my childhood memories have become profoundly distant, it drains my brain like a bag of spuds when I try to remember what it was like, so I thought about my memories on my walk (who am I kidding? I waddle like a duck).
Yes, it is hard to relive your childhood in your mind, to re enact each step, but I literally can only remember big events. Daily life? I remember my brother and I playing basketball with the laundry baskets as the “hoops” in our hallway, I fell through one of those baskets when I sat in it then got stuck, and getting beaten round the bush out side playing football shooting in between the bright orange traffic cones my dad stole from the side of the road. (cheers da!) Every game I usually (always) ended up crying because my brother pushed me too hard. Was I a baby? Or was he too strong? I’m going to agree with both. We all have rights, wahay!
I remember playing oodles of sport & endless days at Róisin’s. Practically all my favorite memories were up at her house, rollerblading, playing in the woods in the trees, playing in the river, sliding down the shed roof’s… Adventurous little ones we were.
I wish I could remember more, so I’m going to jot what I remember down, because the memories are fading away more every day. I wonder have I blocked out a bulk of memories because I feel hurt by what has happened in recent years? If the traumatic experience of not being able to stop my dad from leaving us behind in this world has made me feel numb and like a failure? Subconsciously maybe I don’t want to remember anything from when he was around, because soon ill realize hes not here anymore. Or maybe I just haven’t been doing enough brain teasers over the years? Sudoku just isn’t my thang!
I am currently still in daily pain with Fybromyalgia & something we’ve yet to find out with my hips/back. I constantly have an abundance of things on my mind, that my brain feels like a twister ice pop that wont melt, a tornado that will never stop. I went to my doctors. I am going to be referred to a Orthopedic specialist, yet its my nerves that are affected too, hopefully the doctor will find the root of the cause. And if I’m to receive a injection lets all have our *fingers crossed* no one punctures my other lung, I must explain to them that I quite like having my lungs blown up to size. I mean who likes a burst balloon?
It’s pointless. Also, Who thinks I should audition for Star Wars?