I LOVE Apples.
&& the lovely crunching noise they make when you bite into them, but I never thought my neck would make a louder crunching noise than a juicy Pink Lady. (I should let them in on my secret eh?) Last Thursday, I went to the chiropractor to get meself popped, like my cherry. Well ya found out in the last entry didn’t you?
There was crunching noises, clicks and pops, and loud deep breaths coming from myself. I got me spine manipulated and all popped out, and I survived the neck adjustment, yet the noise do be making me gag. View the following link on Youtube for an example of what I get done & to hear the noises I dislike hearing from my body, gives me the heeby jeebies.
(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YLgq_xXSXLc) I am going for more blood tests Wednesday morning and also a neck X-Ray in the upcoming weeks. Jebus knows how to fix me right? Don’t you Jebus?! *sighhh* That’s enough about this body I despise (said with disgust) with all my might, before my head explodes with annoyance, rage and tears.
Recently Hutchy surprised me with a lovely chocolate Easter Basket gift. Look at the picture. If I took a picture now?… all you would see is the egg….That bunny didn’t stand a chance with me as his master “Get in my belleh” It was ‘sweet’ of him. It was for no reason, just him being awesome & continuing to fatten me up. (I’m doing a good job all by myself) Although now he says he is entitled to make 5 mistakes and that, the present will make up for it?? Smart fellow so he is. As cute as a white chocolate button. *cough cough* LAME. I know, I know but he so cuuuuute. Moving on…. 🙂
I am still working on the camera filming job for the TV series “Connected”. Sometimes yes, bringing around a camera to record my friends, some family and I doing our everyday life is something I think about when sat there looking into the camera.
WHY did I, me? Alanna Diggin? Get chosen to have my dream experience? I have always wanted to do something related to a Reality TV Series. Now that I am one of the participants? I am flattered and feel really special, I literally am so delira with my staighre about this whole experience.
I am not living my dream of being a dancer/singer/performer, my dream of being a ladies soccer star, my dream of just having a average physical working job in a convenient store, dream of being a personal trainer, dream of working as a waitress in a foreign country. This all cannot happen unfortunately due to the way my body has slowly been falling apart…Like a game of Jenga that all of a sudden collapsed, I lost, hard. What I can do though? Is try my best at being creative through the lens of a video camera, learn about life, reality and my friends around me by watching life go by. I learn a lot more about myself and the way I think. I am very open when speaking to the camera. I think it is because no one is there physically looking at me? talking back to me? even acknowledging me? but I know someday you may all see it.
Maybe this is all happening because this is the method I need to take to fix my mind & body? I will still have ups & downs. We all do. (I believe) Without the downside how can we tell what’s good? Someday’s I do give up. Yeah, I don’t do anything all day, I sit here, don’t change, eat, mope and cry. Then the next day Ill give a whack a mole at the gym, eat well, visit family and put my all into a day. Its all to do with balance. I just wish I could put more effort into this recording process. Sometimes my back even stops me with this work, I feel too down/in pain to even try. But I do try my best, I promise you that. Every day I try harder to do and be better. I am not there yet. But everyday we all grow stronger, together.